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Relational Aggression
A high school student cried as she recounted being
tormented in middle school by her classmates. For some reason she was targeted
as a "dog," and day after day she had to walk the halls with kids barking at
her. How did it stop? The girl said she stopped it. But how? She picked out
another girl, someone worse off than herself, and started to call her dog. Then
the others forgot about her. Then they barked at the other girl instead. Girls
may be made of sugar and spice and everything nice, but on the inside, they are
just plain mean. "Girls tease, insult, threaten, gossip maliciously, and play
cruel games with their friends' feelings and set up exclusive cliques and
hierarchies in high schools." (Omaha World Herald, 10A).
Relational
aggression is a fairly new development, which involves adolescent girls and
their emotions. To understand this newly found term, one must start from the
core word "aggression."
After understanding the forms of aggression, one can
slowly begin to understand relational aggression. Aggression is defined as
behavior that is intended to harm others. Aggression can take many forms
including physical violence, date violence, and criminal violence. Most have
related aggression with the male physical violence or "beating up." Most females
have low or do not show any form of aggression; therefore, most people believe
women to be the lesser aggressive sex. It is true that males are proven to be
more aggressive than females, but not by far. This is depending on which form of
aggression is being studied.
So why are girls so "aggressive?" Nicki
Crick, PhD, a researcher at the University of Minnesota says: "Physical
aggression isn't very accepted for girls, so they turn to manipulation and
emotional threats as weapons" (Murray, par 3). "In recent research, it indicates
that gender differences in aggression disappears when the definition of
aggression is broadened to include aggressive acts in whish the victim's
personal relationships are manipulated of damaged-- that is, relational
aggression" (Miller, 145).
"Relational aggression is defined as behaviors
that harm others by damaging (or threatening to damage) or manipulating one's
relationship with his/her peers, or by injuring one's feelings of social
acceptance." (Ophelia Project, "Issues" par 3). This type of aggression is
mainly directed toward the emotions rather than physical behavior. Some examples
of relational aggression include:
Purposefully ignoring someone when one is
angry with the other (i.e. "silent treatment")
Spreading rumors
Telling
others not to talk or engage with them
Trying to take the other's dating
partner (if angry at the same sex) (Burgess, 1)
These behaviors compare to
those of children in preschool or lower elementary classes, which show
immaturity.
One example of relational aggression is that of a girl who was
falsely accused of going on a date with another girl's boyfriend. The victim's
house was egged while she was out to dinner with her parents. The following
week, she could hear others shout harmful and embarrassing things to her. At a
basketball game, the girl approached the victim and verbally harassed her in
front of everyone. She went home and cried that night. She made it through the
school year, but
She had completely dropped out of every activity. The
following year, she transferred schools. This is an example of a severe case of
relational aggression. It got to the point where this girl had to transfer
schools. This is not what girls are supposed to be doing in school or other
activities.
As of the early 1900s, researchers have just started paying
closer attention to relational aggression. Many are beginning to study this
concept due to its cause of concern in the schools in the U.S. Nicki Crick,
Ph.D., seeks to understand the cause of relational aggression, the time span of
relational aggression, and the impact on girls' development in other areas of
life. The researchers have discovered that as early as the age of preschoolers
have developed relational aggression. All social classes are relationally
aggressive. Boys are also relationally aggressive. Most of the children who are
relationally aggressive have symptoms of being lonely and depressed. These
finding have helped researchers find ways to prevent these cruel and flat out
mean occurrences in schools.
They recommend that the children/adolescents
participate in outside-of -school activities, encourage adult relationships, and
always be available to talk. There are so many other ways to help prevent others
from hurting innocent victims. Relational aggression is a mean way of "getting
back" at someone. The researchers believe that it gives "another reason to begin
anti-bullying programs at ever-younger ages" (Omaha World Herald, 10A). Looking
back on the middle school and high school years, is there anytime that you or
someone you knew was a victim of this hateful rage, relational aggression?
Works Cited
Goldenson, Robert M., ed. The Encyclopedia
of Human Behavior; Psychology, Psychiatry, and Mental Health. 2 vols. New York:
Doubleday, 1970.
"Mean Girls Suddenly Are A Hot Topic." Omaha World Herald 2
Apr. 2002,: 10A.
Miller, Patricia H. and Ellin Kofsky Scholmick. Toward A
Feminist Developmental Psychology. New York: Routledge, 2000.
Murray B.
"Girls Wound Each Other With Invisible Weapons, Study Suggests." American
Psychological Association. (1998). 4 Apr. 2002
The Ophelia Project. Ed. Joshua Kinberg. (1997). Research
Collection, U of Minnesota. 4 Apr. 2002
Ramachandran, V.S., ed. Encyclopedia of Human
Behavior. 4 vols. San Diego: Academic Press, 1994.
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